For a modern creative, your image and brand is everything. Show it or people won't know. I wish there was an easier way. A hundred unfinished, unpolished pieces sitting there collecting dust. I run my fingers through them once in a while and sometimes marvel at my own idea. "Damn, that was a good", I can distinctly remember how much I enjoyed the process, or even the music I was listening at the time. But soon after, disinterest will surface and I'll detach myself from feeling too much. I've never understood why that happens until recently. Art is like telling a secret, and when you're not ready to tell the story, you're not ready. We are our own worst enemy and critic. "Oh what would others think?", "this is too embarrassing", "but it's not perfect", "is it good enough to show?" and many thoughts later, I realized that self love and validation is the first and only step to healing. Sharing your art has to come from within. Not because everyone else is doing it, not because you think this will get you success because of more exposure, but because you're ready to tell the world a secret, a side of you that no one else knows.
I'm fighting my inner demons. My inner voice. Let it be assumptions, judgements or anxiety. It's a pain in the ass, but the fight is worth it. It keeps me alive and keeps me going.
I drew that with my left hand, because I felt like it. I'm learning to treasure the moment, be in tune with the present "now". For instance, I'll be doing chores, taking a stroll, doing a little shopping, then mid-way of those, a sudden burst of creativity or a brilliant idea waiting to be explored. Which then, I'll be running home to release that artist jini onto the pages before it fleets away like a shooting star. I'm learning to let the calling come to me. The hardest part is to wait for it patiently.
Dance, dance, dance.
This music reminds me of the sunset beach. I love it. It's the the best time of the day where rest lies ahead and your bed patiently awaits for your snuggle and embrace.
I just came back from a wonderful Sip & Sketch session at the YMCA. Small turnout, but big hearts and kind folks that truly care about the community and discovering creativity within. Genuine people connecting on a personal level is a rare thing these days. I find that when we're connecting through art making, the experience is all the more special. I say this because when you're expressing your art or craft, you're sharing a vulnerable side of you to the world. It is raw, illogical and absurd. But most of all, it is genuine and authentic. So to part take in that communal experience, we're already on a borderline friend zone level (like just almost there).
I also noticed that I've changed in subtle ways to be more open to people. My interaction with others now is more rooted on topics of life, passion and values. I've stopped leading my conversations with "What do you do?", because in all honesty, I don't really care. I'm learning to listen more intently for words both said and unsaid. I love chatting with Lyft/Uber drivers to learn more about the neighbourhoods they serve. I'm resisting the need to browse or surf online when I'm in the presence of another human being. Also, giving other people the benefit of the doubt because first impressions can be easy to judge. It's like what they say about everyone you meet is fighting a different battle or putting up a front for self defense, I'm still training myself to be more understanding of that. Be open, Dig deep and embrace all is kind of the mantra I'm going for these days.